About a year ago, I found a blog that truly inspires me – the Happy Wives Club. Truth be told, I wasn’t at a particularly awesome place in my marriage. In fact, I was worn thin and we were frustrating each other quite a bit, if I recall. After meeting with a friend for some wise and biblical counsel for several months, and after reading a really great book – What’s It Like to Be Married to Me?, I’d purposed in my heart to be intentional about building my husband up instead of focusing on the things that maybe aren’t lovely. During my lunch at work that day, I came across an awesome group of women in that blog, from all over the globe, who were choosing to be happy in marriage.
Happy wives – that was (sadly) a shift in thinking. Although I’d always tried to look for the best in my husband, it wasn’t a popular practice. We women are so bombarded with tales of low-down cheatin’ husbands, selfish husbands, abusive husbands, weak and loser husbands…even in church. But this group of women came together to speak life and love into their marriages; they were encouraging each other to find the best in their husband and tell the world. They chose to be happy wives. I chose to be a happy wife and joined the club.
So, I’ve followed along with her posts on facebook and on her blog. I have read so many stories about marriages reconciled from the brink of divorce and of ho-hum marriages becoming awesome. I’ve enjoyed them all. Their tips on praying for and encouraging their husbands have been really inspiring and I’ve tried out many of them. These women looked at their own attitudes and habits to change their marriages for the better and that was just resonating in my heart. That’s the kind of wife I was trying to be – looking at my attitude, my sins and not pointing out his. Then she started this “Why I Love My Husband – the Never-Ending List” series where she started posting about five or so reasons “why” every week and just kept adding to the list. What a concept – a list, a mindset to disprove the misconception that wives are miserable and marriages don’t last!
How awesome could my marriage be, could your marriage be, if we were on the hunt for at least 5 reasons to appreciate or brag on our husbands each week? We’re taught from an early age to nag and find fault in our spouse. How could God use a heart that’s focus is for building up instead of tearing down? Seems to me that marriage would be on FIRE!
It’s been weeks since first discovering the list, but now it’s time to jump in. So, as The Happy Wives set aside Thursdays for listing love and encouragement for their husbands, I’m going to join them. My reasons will probably range from simple to silly to deep, but that’s life. And I’m guessing that when the storm clouds roll in, this list will be a reminder for my heart to look up instead around me at the mess.
Why I Love My Husband (the never-ending list):
1. He chose me. Out of all of the girls in the world, he asked me to share his name.
2. He is kind and compassionate. He is always finding someone to help – with a small gift, an offer to babysit, by carpooling their kids to activities.
3. He is involved in our kids’ lives – he’s a scout leader, a Bible verse helper, a homework tutor, a merit badge counselor…
4. He provides for our family. He gets up and goes to his office and makes a paycheck and brings it home. This is a quality that should not be over-looked. I’ve seen marriages lacking this quality and it was ugly.
5. He brags on my cooking. This might seem silly, but there is nothing better than planning, shopping, cooking and presenting a meal to have it receive rave reviews. I am SUPER encouraged by his readiness to compliment my cooking.
Wow. That’s was easy! But, I’ll save some more reasons for next time.